Gingrich Ghetto Language

Apparently Newt never learned the USA has no official language.

Intellectual Theft

So apparently, Newt forgot to acquire the rights to the song he plays at all of his rallies.  For more information, look read here.

Santorum: World Class Bigot

I find it amazing how someone seeking such a powerful office can be so willfully ignorant of the rest of the world.  He would know better if he paid attention in his 9th grade history class.

Ron Paul's Web of Truth

What's the difference between Ron Paul and any other politician who gets caught in a lie?

Nothing at all, he just denies, denies, denies.

Now is he a racist?  Probably not. But he is probably an opportunist who saw a way to sell more newsletters.

Out of town

I'll be out of town and away from the computer for the next few days.  As a result, I will not be able to regularly update this blog for a couple of days.

Civil Rights

"We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. -That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed" -Declaration of Independence

What does the above quote mean?  Well first off, all men (and women) are created equal, and we have certain rights that cannot be taken away.  These chief rights are life (don't murder people), liberty (freedoms), and the pursuit of happiness (try to be happy, but not at the expense of other people).  This was an adaptation from the writings of the enlightenment thinker John Locke.

The second part is the important stuff. "That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed".  We elect officials to enact laws, and protect our rights.  They do so with our permission.  This means if they displease us, we can vote them out.  We vote for politicians because we have what is called a Federalist Republic.  For those of you who don't know, that means we vote for representatives who are supposed to run the government for us.  Our founding fathers realized the direct democracy (a democracy where all citizens vote on everything), would not work in a very large country, where most of the people were uneducated.

Chris Christie has proposed that we should have left the issues of Civil Rights up to the people to decide, but the fact of the matter is our founding fathers created a government where the people do not get a direct say.  It's a lot of trouble getting everyone to vote on every matter.  It is also very expensive, and no one would have the time to do their actual jobs.

On top of that, the states left the Federal Government no choice but to take action during the 1960s.  The Supreme Court ordered the integration of schools in 1954.  None of the segregated states took any action until Congress passed laws and the Executive Branch forced the states to enforce them.  His idea that the people of Jersey should decide laws pertaining to Civil Rights is just wrong.  Our government simply wasn't built that way.  Also, "all people are created equal" means all people, not just straight people.

Oliver Twist

Santorum went on the attack against Romney during last night's debate.  Having recently stated that he would be open to being Vice Present on another candidate's ticket, one has to wonder if something happened behind the scenes to cause that attack.  You have to figure that if he wins the nomination, Romney is more likely to pick Chris Christie or Mitch Daniels than Rick Santorum.

Newt Gets Bible Schooled

We all know the narrative, Newt is now a good old fashioned repentant Catholic.  But if he lived during Biblical times, he would not have lived this long. Most reasonable people would agree that we do not want to use biblical law to rule our society.  The fact of the matter is, our founding fathers did not want to live by biblical law either.  Stoning counts as cruel and unusual punishment, and that was the normal way the death penalty was carried out during Biblical times.  

Still, if Newt wants to have a country governed by religious virtues, maybe he should move to Iran or Saudi Arabia.  I know those aren't "Christian" countries, but aside from a few small differences, isn't much of a difference between Christian religious law, and Islamic law.  Both think Jesus is important.  Both follow the Old and New testaments, and both worship the same God.  Both think that anyone who doesn't follow their religion is damned to hell.  The biggest difference is that Muslims can't eat pig or drink alcohol, and follow a prophet named Muhammad.

Also, he compared gay marriage to paganism, but last time I checked, members of so called pagan religions are allowed to get married in the United States.  This is due to the fact that the First Amendment guarantees freedom of religion.  Personally, I feel gay marriage should be legal, but if Newt's argument is that it shouldn't be legal because it is like paganism, he's going to have to take it a step further an ban pagan marriages too.

Operation Moon Base

Newt has continually claimed that he will cut taxes and balance the budget at the same time.  This makes not sense.  But adding on the construction of a moon base makes his entire existence a fantasy world.

Rick Santorum - Speaking From the Heart

To be honest, I hate the lines at airports.  There has to be a better way to screen passengers before they board planes, but terrorists come in all shapes, sizes, and colors.  All that's required is a fanatic loyalty to an extreme cause.

For more on this story, read this article.

Bachmann's Basic Business Plan

Some members of the GOP, the champion of the free market system, the captains of capitalism, have started saying we need to start emulating the business practices of China.  WTF?!?  The champions of personal freedom want to give businesses the power to literally rule the lives of their workers.  Then again, I suppose they are just trying to protect the rights of some of our most persecuted people...the corporations.

They keep saying we need to end the welfare state and force Americans to pick themselves up by their own bootstraps, and now it's like they are saying our workers need to do it at a rate of $1.00 an hour.

Chinese factory workers live in cramped, dirty dorms.  Their rent plus the cost of food is just a shade less than what they make.  Apparently paid dorm fees are automatically removed from their paychecks,  so even if they choose to forgo company housing, the workers are often compelled to pay rent at the company dorm.  And if they get sick, the company's stance is often, "No work, no pay."  It's similar to how factory workers were treated in the United States around the turn of the 20th century.

For more details, go here.

Boehner Thoughts

He looked disinterested for most of the address, then again, what can you expect when he says this before the speech even takes place?  I imagine they are going to label Obama's, "Level the playing field" comment class warfare.

Potshots with Palin

I've promised myself not to go for the easiest joke possible, that quote in the first panel speaks for itself.

Gingrich!!

I know you can never be sure what goes on in someone else's head, but you can always imagine.

Newt and Chuck on Child Labor

I wonder if Grassley was sitting on his couch at home and saw consecutive news stories on childhood obesity, and the shortage of farm labor in Alabama before coming up with this idea.  I've got a better idea for ending the childhood obesity epidemic than putting the kids to work.  Make sure the kids have physical education classes in schools, and bring back recess.

Romney's Reflections

He really is just another hereditary American success story.  It must be awesome when your family wealth leaves you in a position of means to do whatever you want.

My What a Lovely Tea Party!

Santorum Unplugged - 5

You have to love how candidates often let the truth slide when convenient.

 I also find it funny how Santorum has recently stated that simply being pro-choice is a radical/extremist position.  Personally I define being an extremist as someone who suffers from an inability to compromise.

Gingrich!

It's amazing that Gingrich can promote child labor in a debate, and none of his rivals called him out on it.  Child labor...really?  That has got to be one of the dumbest ideas any major politician has come up with since it came to light that Michele Bachmann endorses having gay people pray their sexual orientation away.

I also do not understand how he has been able to get away with painting himself as a Washington outsider when he was both the Speaker of the House, and a Washington lobbiest.  The only real outsider who was ever officially in the race was Herman Cain.  It's also interesting that Cain's campaign ended after details about sordid sexual indiscretions came to light, yet when details about Gingrich's iffy past come out, he is able to play the "poor me" card, and win a primary.  It's hypocritical of the press to let Gingrich off after execrating Cain.  Then again, when it comes to Gingrinch, nothing makes sense.

He says some of the craziest shit.  For instance, he once said, “It doesn’t matter what I do. People need to hear what I have to say. There’s no one else who can say what I can say. It doesn’t matter what I live.”

You also have to love someone who rails against the "elitest" left, but says, “I’m not a natural leader. I’m too intellectual; I’m too abstract; I think too much.”  What an asshat! 

Romney's Reflections - 2

I love watching when politicians avoid the question.  It'll be interesting to see if Romney actually releases his records on Tuesday.  I'm also looking forward to seeing whether or not Gingrich ever releases his ethics records.

Santorum Unplugged - 4

I'm not sure how much glitter bombs serve to actually further the Occupy causes.  Then again, common sense and reason have pretty much been absent from the political discourse for quite a few years.  Still, the glitter bomb couldn't have happened to a nastier guy.  This guy's policies are downright scary.  Sure he looks benign enough, but then again, so did Senator Palpetine.

 And we all know how that turned out...Personally, I'd prefer it if our reality didn't mirror George Lucas' imagination.  The strange thing is he doesn't even hide his views.   He keeps saying crazy shit, but it seems like no one listens.

I know he's completely unelectable, but that doesn't mean he isn't dangerous.

Romney's Reflections.

It's looking increasingly clear that Obama will be re-elected.

Santorum Unplugged - 3

I'll admit that it was Santorum's staffer who said it would be unbiblical to have a woman president, but Santorum has done nothing to refute the statement.

Paul's Policies

Say what you want about Globalization, but turning the U.S.A. back into the "isolationist" country that it never was is a completely moronic idea.  I know we get ourselves involved in starting wars we have no business starting, and our foreign policy can be described as imperialistic.  It definitely needs an overhaul, but this "plan" is unrealistic.  As for the idea, that the U.S.A., Mexico and Canada are secret planning to unite into some sort of super country...Well Ron seems to believe it, but that just sounds like fringe conspiracy theory to me.

Paul's Policies

Libertarianism reminds me of nihilism.

Santorum Unplugged #2

For reference, check this out. I know Santorum is trying to highlight one of the many hypocrisies of Newt, but I think the only thing he actually accomplished is looking bat-shit insane.

Santorum Unplugged

Gingrich Goofs

Here is Gingrich's original attack ad where he compares Romney to John Kerry and insinuates that they are both too French.

#1 - Gingrich Goofs

Welcome to Paranoid Politico. This blog has been created for the express purpose of my own enjoyment.  I make all of these comics using a program called Comic Life.  It's very easy to buy.  I intend to keep this up for as long as it interests me.  Please bear in mind that I work a normal day job, and will not have the time to update this thing during normal work hours on weekdays.